#The Human apreciation society

[the-possum-writes]

Hiiii!! I just finished watching AT again, and i been loking for some FinnxReaderxFern fics, and i read ur at content and i just love it.So i was hopping if i could request a fic where Finn and Fern has this, confrontation? Jelousy talk? about each other's feelings about reader!!

You can Say no if you don't wanna do it, but i would really apreciated<3.

[Confronting their feelings about you]

❥Character(s): Finn, Fern

❥Tags: SFW, canon typical violence, expressing emotions, gender neutral pronouns for the reader

 ❥Synopsis: What started as a simple afternoon dedicated to cleaning turned into a short lived but intense knife fight when you came up as a conversation topic.

 ❥Wordcount: 1000

❥A/N: I want this gress boy to heal so i'll take whatever chance i get to write him learning to overcome his Finn jelousy.

❥Taglist: @foxpearlwilder

Today is a typical day for the guys; a knife storm has just passed, so they are calmly brushing away the residual weaponry from clogging the top of the treefort, like they do when there is hail or dry tree leaves. "There's less daggers compared to last time, makes ya wonder why huh Fern?" During the cleanup, Finn speaks aloud, the idea circling through his mind a few times

"Hmm, probably because of climate change." Fern disputes bluntly.

Finn pauses in his sweeping to glance up at the sky, contemplating to himself before offering his own two cents. "Or is it because the knife god is dissatisfied with the number of swords and knives forged this year? That the sword-smiths probably have a secret society where they sacrifice things in exchange for good materials." The longer the human boy rambles, the more Fern is interested by the explanation and begins unironically contributing his own perspective.

"What if the knife god sends us knives to test if they're nice and sharp?" The offer compels Fern to stop sweeping as well, although his reason for doing so is more of a curiosity to see if his human brother can figure out what he is thinking about. With them still being the same guy, Finn shares that challenging expression in his eye.

Fern swoops down and throws a knife at Finn, but the boy rolls to the side and retrieves a knife from the ground just in time to deflect the second knife thrown at him. Fern attempts to continue throwing blades at his playmate, but he only draws closer in range, forcing Fern to sidestep the pointy jabs directed at him as he grabs his own knife, and they begin sparring right there with the brooms long forgotten. They go at it for a while till Finn notices the sun leaning over the horizon and remembers something.

"Okay okay that's enough, let's wrap this up before the sun goes down."

"Got somewhere to go?" Fern asks as he hops from side to side, still energized from the spar.

"Yeup, a friend wants to collect kelp samples for a college project and I promised I'd help."

"Kelp samples?" Hah! That's boring..." His smile faded. "Wait.. you talking about the biology student that's always cooped up at Turtle P's library?"

Finn confirms, "That's the one." While the human boy skipped happily at the thought of you, Fern's jaw tightened as he felt an unpleasant stir in his chest. Finn had his back to Fern and was in the process of picking up his fallen broom when a knife imbedded itself just next him, missing his palm by only an inch.

"Who knowsss what kind of trouble you'll sstumble into when you're out there collecting kelp sssamples, you could get ambushed by kelpies or banditsss," the grass boy explains with a low tone and a snake whisp in his tongue before his voice shifted back to normal. "They are my friend too! and the last thing I want is to find out they got hurt because you weren't able to help. Now, pick up that knife and show me you can protect them from anyone and anything."

Finn considers the challenge, normally he'd never say no to one but he's grown familiar enough with Fern's mood swings to know it's that darn octopus messing up his head again, but if there's any best way to get it out of his system it's by sparring. With that goal in mind, Finn acepts the challenge even though it means fighting Fern when he's at his "most intense". The duel starts just like the previous one but the longer it went on the more Finn came to realize it no longer had the same playful approach as before, it became all the more apparent whenever Fern purposely scratches at him every time he left opening rather than playfully bump him with the butt of the dagger.

"They're my friend I'd never let anything happen to them!" Finn grinds his teeth as their blades collide.

"I knew them way before you did, i was gonna ask them out... before..." Fern stutters for a second, giving Finn the opportunity to kick him in the back of the knee and knock him down.

"Before you turned into a sword right?" Despite the takedown, Finn's tone softens as he assists his brother in standing up. "So that's what has you all jumbled up. Fern, remember what I said about bottling up your feelings?"

"That I should use my words." He nods like a scolded child.

"How about you share'em with me?" Finn held Fern in hug before giving him a much needed squooze.

Fern sighs. "You know more than anyone why I like them. And when I heard you were going out with them I guess I got a little jealous."

'Right just a bit,' Finn thought, but didn't dare to speak it out and upset his grass bro. "Have you considered asking them out yet?" The human youngster suggests, "You know, like on an actual date and not just collect samples." It sounds simple enough to him, but Fern's inner struggle makes it not so simple.

"I did. But after the whole "I turned into a sword and then the grass disaster," I had a feeling that they wouldn't even want to look at me." Fern deflates and drops down Finn's grip while he explains, but Finn holds him up again.

"Well, you'll never know unless you try it out!"

Fern turned his head in the direction of his human counterpart. "What? But what about YOU? I am sure you have a crush on them."

Finn scratched the back of his neck. "I mean, I do. They're really amazing with the knowledge they have about a bunch of stuff, however... I've already dunked on my other relationships, if anything I'll probably ruin this one too."

For once, Fern sees a part of himself in Finn that isn't just superficial similarities; the hesitance and self-doubt are all too familiar, and despite the little devil inside him telling him to exploit Finn's weakness, he instead tries to encourage him. "Finn, you're a great shot ."

A knock on the door and a doorbell ring from below the tree fort, followed by your familiar voice asking for someone to open it. The two brothers exchange glances before Fern breaks the silence. "How about we each take our shot and let them decide?" he asks, offering a peace deal with a handshake.

"Sounds good."

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Batman Unburied for the fandom blorbo ask game?

Oooh. I'm soo excited.

Okay. Okay. Let's go.

Blorbo - Riddler, I would say obviously but Barbara also deserves it, the thing is Edward is always my blorbo and Unburied is one of my favorite Eddies so he is blorbo. Okay. Actually they can share. They are a duo for a long part of the show, they can be my double blorbo.

Scrunkly - okay. Eddie. But he is already blorbo so instead I'm gonna say Bruce. He is super badass but also super cute and caring and I love him. He definitivaly opens my protective agression (though realistically he would be the one protecting me).

Scrimblo Bimblo - Barbara. Now hear me out: she is very apreciated but I personally think she still deserves more apreaciation. Pam is on the same vein. Until people are workshipping this woman isn't enough.

In a more accurate definition both King Tut and Reene Montoya. Love them, unapreciated, deserved more screem time.

Glup Shitto - Again Reene and Tut. But like real obscure the employeers from Wayne Tech from that one scene and the henchmen that was voiced by Griffin McElroy. [Honorable mention Summer Gleyson, loved her, she should be a radio host more].

Poor Little Meow Meow - Eddie. He is everything. But also Pamela, owner of my hearth, she is perfect, love her, she deserves the world but she is sorta problematic, I mean I believe she did nothing wrong but I was told murder, kiddnaping and planning to wipe out humanity and all we did to give Earth back to the Green is frown upon by modern society. I woind't call her pathetic but none of her plans suceeded so maybe a bit due to unfortunate circunstances (now besides Eddie this would be the perfect place for Stirk but, controversial opinion, I have no feelings towards him whatsoever, he had good scenes but I care very little for Stirk as a person).

Horse Plinko - with love? Probably Eddie, Pam or Babs, maybe Bruce. With the power of hate? Flass and Strange. Just because I think their reaction would be funny? Jervis and Stirk.

Eeby Deepy - Flass. I hope he dies a violent, humiliating and painfull death. I hate him sooo mucn.

[chiefatticcreator]

Kalto a demi human being security in the soul society though after hearing about the battle he went to the mortal realm and found Harribel, he could finish the job instead he used a collar on her to show she belong to him and took her to his place. He let her rest and recover though made sure the collar remind her that she belong to the one person that spared her life.

“I’m taking a big risk with this if anyone finds out I’m in deep trouble.” He said to himself though if he could keep her at his place to give her shelter and food.

"Let me free." Harribel struggled against the collar. Seh apreciated that he had saved his life, but she didn't want to be anyone's slave.

[365lasochraide]

smile, boys

This sonds like yuor about to take a group picture with the shams xD

smile: do you prefer soft kisses or making out?

Why not both? I belive their all presious parts of being with some body, just different moods. ^_^

boys: what’s your favourite thing about dating boys

That is a very togh question to ask a bisexual XD If were sticing to the all-ages aspects: my experince dating boys is quiet aventuros, some how I feel as if I can be a tad more relcess, sillier even, around them. On the other hand not many men are in toch wih their deeper feelings but the ones who are make it such a lovly experence to share those heart felt moments, it's like were breching some notably private terirtory together while also defying wha society expects of us. It feels liberting and tender at once, and its diferent from breking defined rols with women becase when I'm with a man we both undesand it at a deep personal level. Not that once is beter than the other their simply differ experences.

And then tehre are the phisical aspecs of course. I absolutely adore the way a mans masels show under his skin, and how his neck can be soft and rogh at the same time, and I deeply apreciate all curvs in the human body no mater if their sharp and anglar or soft and harmnous. Furter more there is just some thing about the way men were longer hair isnt there? :)

[originalwinnercheesecake]

Gus Porter Appreciation Post

I have been wanting to do gull analysis of the important characters in The Owl house since like 2/3rds of the way through season 2. Now that the first season 3 special is right around the corner It feels like a good time to make posts and get views again.

Gus is a character I find particularly interesting. In season 1 and for part of season 2 Gus is there, but he is secondary comic relief, very token, and almost never seems to move or affect the plot. He slowly grows as a character with and develops arc’s though, and whats interesting to me is that unlike with characters like Luz/Eda/Willow I cannot really say when his character hit the turning point. I mean I know when his character had shifts, or started to focus more visibly on certain aspects of his character, a lot of the big moments his character goes through and core aspects that come to spotlight in episodes like “Through The Looking Glass” and “Labyrinth Runners” on re-watch actually start more subtle in the back ground of season 1 episodes.

Warning very long post underneath

Things with Gus that could have been done better

Okay first lets address some of the weakness’s of Gus’s character. I want to get those out of the way so that I can spend more time speaking his praises. Up top I call him 3 things “Secondary comic relief” “token” and “unimportant plot wise”. I stand by all three being true (at least for a lot of the series) and all three can be problems with his character. For the “secondary comic relief” one... King is out main source of comic relief. King is voiced by Alex Hirsch, who many fan’s recognize as the creator and voice actor for many Gravity Falls characters. He is a very funny man. King himself is also a funny character, because he sees himself as big and ferocious, has a large personality, and all of this is wrapped up into a like 2.5 ft tall fluffy little dog body. Gus’s first ever job in the show was to come assist Luz on adventures and mishaps where she would be away from Eda and King. Unlike King though Gus does not have a large personality, and with his a main trait being “Self-proclaimed “Human Expert”, when actually everything he says is wrong” he just never seemed as funny. Also King despite being mostly comic relief had lore and backstory from the beginning, taught Luz about demons and life with Eda, and was able to come up with clever ways to help defeat foe’s. Gus... shares his food, and can do basic distracting.

I called him “token”. that is a word that I know gets thrown around a lot, and there is some argument as to when it is appropriate and what it means. So let me give the definition I learned for “token”: One or a few characters that are different from the main cast in a noticeable way, and are added in mainly to give the illusion of this show/book/game being inclusive.” You know how in 90′s and early 2000′s shows about super hero’s/crime fighting a team will have that one (or maybe two if its a big team) female character because otherwise the show writers can be accused being sexist “don’t you think girls can be hero’s too”? Plus without her they will have more trouble doing cliche romance tropes. Or how about in Christmas specials you always have at least one who is briefly stated or shown to be Jewish, because of course the show runners know that Christianity isn’t the only religion, and Christmas is not the only holiday. Gus would qualify as a token character for two reasons. One is that he is one of the only few boys at Hexside who is learning magic, and is also important enough to have a name. The score for that I believe is Girls 11, Boys 5. Of those 5 Jerbo and Barkus were intended to be one off characters and while we saw them again they got no focus and virtually no development (Barkus is in a hexsis holdum club, Jerbo flew for that jerk professors flyer derby team that one time). Edric only shows up spuraticaly and rarely is shown at school. Mattholomule also rarely shows up, and when he does it is to be a parallel foil to Gus (more on him and that later). So Gus is our only frequently occurring boy to actively bee seen trying to become a witch.

Secondly he can count as a token Black character. The Owl house has prioritized  including 3D characters of different sexuality, and learning types. Its disability representation has also gained positive notice and appreciation by its audiance as well. But is does have some problems and struggles in race. I will start by saying that I am white, and as such I do not notice as many things as a POC would when it comes to racial inclusion, and my word should always come second to a POC’s when talking about this. But even I can notice that Amity’s character seemed completely thought out and written with fluid direction when Dana and the crew were still throwing Mabel, Webby, Star, Anne, every other off-beat, family carton, female protagonist of the last 10 years, and multiple popular teen cliche’s all against the wall to see what stuck as character for Luz. Even I can note the racism on giving Luz a new White Mom when she already had a Latina Mom. Then treating White Mom as her main/better/more fun mom, because Latino Mom tells tries to change Luz (get her to tone down her more destructive behavior while at school) but White Mom lets Luz do whatever she wants, up to and including praising her for crime. And even I can notice how Gus got way way less screen time and focus than characters who had lighter skin than him. Now here I want the opinion of POC fans: in season 2 Dana and the crew added 3 more POC characters (Raine, Darwin, and Darius), brought back 2 existing characters (Katya and Mattholomule) and, admittedly more towards the end of the season 2, gave Gus and Skara more focus. Did this feel to you like Dana and the Crew noticing and correcting an issue, or did it feel more like the damage control?

Gus’s plot relevance in episodes is kinda self explanatory. In 1B he does not even participate in shenanigans and mishaps that Luz,Willow, and Amity do. He is the group cheerleader. Which would be fine if they let him do all the cool tricks, acrobatics, and full on routines cheerleaders do. Combining his illusion powers with all of that would have been really awesome. But instead of doing any of that they just gave him two small flags that he waved back in fourth from the stands. That was his whole cheer routine, and most of his 1B character... Okay now I am finally done with writing out the flaws/problems with his character, remember I do love this character, and can move on with praises.

Gus’s magic abilities

Gus’s learning trope is that he the “stressed out gifted kid”. He is a protege magician when it comes to Illusion magic, and have even skipped 2 grades. Okay We do not know that much about how different grades work at Hexisde (it’s an all grade school) since Luz our main character see’s the school for the first time at 14. Given that Luz enrolls during a Summer semester I am guessing that Hexisde is a year round school (how do grade levels work at those? I do not know) that does like 4 three week breaks during each season. But I am going to guess that Elementary level kids learn about the different coven tracks and opportunity’s in them, middle school kids pick their track and learn the basics/early lessons, then High school kids perfect their magic and take more advanced lessons. We have never heard Lilith or Raine or any of the Blights mention Colleges, so maybe its not a thing on the isles and kids only leave when coven recruiters come and take them away...

Gus again skipped two grades and “Labyrinth Runners” implies he does it pretty young, he looks like 9 or 10 in his flashback of his first week in advanced classes. If Willow’s powers came late, could Gus have developed Illusion powers early? We also see that he wasn’t then and still is not now in complete control of his powers. My guess is that when Perry and Bump saw what Gus was capable of they moved him up those grades because they believed the best thing for Gus was to get help from an experienced illusion professor who could help him learn more control and mastery of his powers. We can see how great the Illusion professor is in “Labyrinth Runners”, and how much she cares about Gus.

In season 1 Gus mostly sticks to what seems like advanced basics. He could sentences in the air, and make copies of himself, and he was amazing at it. He was not doing one letter at a time, or even one word at a time, he could magic whole sentences into the air at once with great theatrics. His can make multiple copies at once. His copies still remain fully functional when he is away from them, and they can all talk. For clones made by a child, they are very advanced copies. In “Looking Glass Ruins“ Gus makes an illusion large enough to cover a small grave yard, and then In “Labyrinth Runners” his school. In that episode he also pockets a powerful magnifier glass that lets him peer into foes heads and call fourth bad memories. This gives Gus a way to cause actual damage to Belos in “King’s Tide”.... But Gus may have been hit some recoil on that.

This brings me to another part of Gus’s character that I love: He gets progressively stronger through out the show, but he never reaches the ceiling of his potential. He can give his copies more advanced mobility and speaking skills, But when he does they are less likely to do what he wants. See the that only pretended to take notes for him when he skipped, and the one that he made when he wanted to interview himself who promptly told him “I would rather die than reveal my secrets”. He is not able to make large illusions in season 1, and in season 2 they tire him and he still loses control if they go over a certain size. He learns to use the magnifier glass quickly, but he can only us it on an already subdued opponent and using it may pose danger to him in the process. Gus has all the potential to become a mater illusionist, and the dreams and ambition to become even more. But all of this will be one day in the future. For now he is a kid who needs to keep studying and practicing so he can get better, smarter, and wiser.  This brings me to my next point about Gus

Relatable Fears

First off let’s look at the pressure Gus puts on himself. He loves to brag about getting to skip two grades. He can be a show off with his magic, and when mentioning that his dad wants him to become a master illusionist he laughs says “That’s easy”, and declares that he will become this powerful and new figure in relational politics and end a long standing feud between the boiling Isle residents and the Giraffe’s.

When tries to help Willow deal with a pixie infestation with an illusion and it doesn’t help at all, and she gets hurt anyway, He goes through a huge existential crisis and starts wondering openly questioning if the illusion track is even worth studying. Some bullies trick him into helping them clear a way to the graveyard for them, before revealing they do not want to be his friends and do not care about his feeling’s or opinions. Gus blames himself for all of this. Who was he kidding thinking Bria actually cared? Well it’s not his fault. HE thought Bria cared because she did a really good job of putting on a show of acting like she cared. Its pretty high key hinted that he does this all the time at Glandis and that’s how she keeps her three “friends” and probably others under her thumb. Heck its low key hinted that she got Mattholomule in so much trouble that his parents took him out of Glandis at least in part to get him away from her and the members of their group. Gus isn’t stupid, Bria is just a skilled manipulator.

After Bria Gus and the cast, unfortunately meet, Adrian Graye Venworth. Gus see’s through his first illusion and saves Edric and the other kids from being tricked into getting sigiled. But Later Gray and a member of the Emperor’s Coven trick Gus into almost going with them by casting an illusion to make the Coven Scout look like Willow. Hunter See’s through the Illusion and grabs Gus yelling that it is a trick. Gus is devastated that he could not tell the difference between his best friend and an illusion and concludes that he must be stupid and have something seriously wrong with him. A few things that I will point out here (and I am so glad Hunter points out to Gus in the episode). Gus is not at fault at all. The coven guard pretending to be Willow fooling him? They showed up when Gus was in danger, scared, and desperate to find help so of course he feels a wave of relief at Willow. Hunter saw through it because he has rained himself to never drop his guard (he has had to) But Gus has no reason to distrust Willow. Even if he was fooled it was never a fair fight. Gus is a gifted kid, but he is still only a 12 year old kid, and is still learning. The Emperor’s coven is made up of all the most ambitious students and highest scores AFTER they graduated school, past tons of vigorous recruitment tests, and devoted their lives to nothing but improving their magic and serving the Emperor. Adrian is a Coven head, a.k.a the top ranking Illusionist on The Titian. Him and all he guards are older and have both more training and experience than Gus. They were able to fool Bump and the Hexside teachers too, and none of them are fools. Gus’s only problem is the pressure he puts on himself.

To go a bit deeper into Gus’s fears, we see him began to work through his fears in season 2 but I think his arc with fear and overcoming it actually starts in season 1′s ‘Enchanting Grom Fight”. Remember at the end of it when Willow and Gus are helping with the clean up and that peace of Grom morphs into their fears. We see that Willow is afraid of ladybugs (???) and that Gus is afraid of clowns. Now Clowns are a pretty common, it would be enough to assume Gus is scared of their big red grins, yellow teeth, or giant stomping feet. But in “Through the Looking Glass Ruins” through that Illusions are not able to help solve his friend’s issues like Gus hopped he loses faith in them and himself. Then h starts calling Illusions “party tricks” and himself a “clown”. Which descends to “Stupid”, “Fool”, and “Kidding himself” in “Labyrinth Runners”. You add all this together and it equals Gus not being scared of clowns because of creepy make-up, oversized cloths, or how in-your-face some clowns are. We only see the clown image Grom used on Gus from the back but I am gonna gus its front looked kinda similar to Gus himself. “Clown” is the bad name Gus calls himself when he gets angry/scared/or frustrated at his own mistakes. Gus is scared that maybe he is destined to be a clown. Maybe his dad, teachers, friends, and himself are all fooling themselves when they call him someone special, and maybe everything he is good at is just stupid, unimportant, party tricks.

THAT IS NOT TRUE. Gus’s is a great friend and his support has done a lot for Willow, Luz, King, Mattholomule, and Hunter. He has been a real light and the dark for them all. While his illusions have limits, he starts finding knew things he can do with them throughout the season as he improves (and we thankfully say god bye to the Gus the uninspiring cheerleader and the two tiny flags that all he does is flick back and forth). Gus’s own magic feets even hit Heroic status on at least three occasions “Through the Looking Glass Ruins”, “Labyrinth Runners”, and “Kings Tide” where if not for him things would have gone much worse and potentially innocent lives could have been ruined or lost. Gus can, is, and will be great witch. He just needs to take some time, and come into it in his own way.

Gus’s development into a more empathetic friend and his growth and maturity through out the show.

Just a small heads up most of this will be about Gus’s relationships with other males. I know, I know Willow and Luz are his best friends. I am not trying to undervalue his relationships with them, they are great friends and very important to him. The reason I am not talking much about them is that his friendships with them start from their first meeting and remain really consent throughout the show. There is never really any change. They are all friends, Willow and Luz know he is younger by a couple years but they do not treat him any different for it. Gus loves this and is super protective of both of them, trying to jump on or “Gus chomp” any big kid who calls one of the Trio “losers’ or tries to give them a hard time.

Let’s start with the first time we see Gus in his element. Gus’s time as the President of the Human Appreciation Society (a school based club he started). This was Gus at his absolute worst, most jerkish, and it got him nothing. Gus says in the episode that he created the club because being the youngest kid in his grade he was always overlooked and wanted to create a place where that would not happen to anyone. When he says that it is the only time that he is either kidding himself or just being stupid. Because Gus is a tyrannical leader that and overlooks every other person there. No really he is. Gus calls himself “The President” but also made himself a crown, like he’s the king. He has a huge list of rules that he made himself and that no one else is allowed even comment on. He is the only person allowed to touch the objects, He is the only one allowed to make decisions (he legit see’s the group wanting to vote as anarchy), and judging by his reaction to Matty dumping out his backpack Gus may even be the only one who is usually allowed to bring in artifacts. Gus made himself a place where he would get to be in charge of kids older than him and they would have to listen to what he says. Well later in the show we see that Bigger Kids used to take advantage of Gus’s trust and trick him into doing their work for him. These are his worst memories.So seeing that I can see why Gus would want a place like the H.A.S., but that is an explanation for his behavior and not a excuses. He is acting like his old bullies and it is getting him nowhere. The bigger kids in his club must stay because they are interested in learning more about human culture, because they do not seem to care for or like Gus. When Mattholomule challenges him for leadership two kids support him and one just proclaims himself “an undecided voter”; none of them back Gus. When Bump kicks Gus out of the club none of the kids care or ever speak to him again.

Losing the club was painful for Gus in the short term because it was a club he cared about (and it led to 1b Gus and his boring obsession with two tiny flags. They really could not have also given him a horn, some lights, or put the flags on a baton), but after the way he had acted I cannot say he did not deserve to lose it, and he did grow from this. His relationship with King is the first one to show his growth. In “Really Small problems” Luz gets the day off from school and decides to take King to the carnival. While there she runs into Willow and Gus and asks King if they can join them. Gus is really condescending to King here, but King agrees to let them join for Luz. Willow and Gus do not listen to what King wants to do, gradually take more of Luz’s attention, and eventually fully exclude King. This drives King so crazy that he buys a potion to make Gus and Willow temporarily disappear. Which of course he bought from a con artist, its actually a scam that gets everybody in trouble, and King has to apologize and explain his loneliness to the other kids. He tried to make peace with Gus and Willow by offering them both pieces of broken friendship necklaces which they both take. Gus thanks King saying that he has always wanted “A jagged piece of cheap metal”. Willow gets on to Gus, I guess believing he is still being condescending, but I do think Gus was checking himself. Two episodes later when everyone is getting excited about Grom Gus gets to be the announcer and he goes to King to ask if he would like to be his assistant. When King gets stage fright Gus finds him and helps him through it in a much more tactful and friendly way. Gus is 3-4 years older than King, so to King Gus is a big kid. When King confessed the way Willow and Gus made him feel, I think this was the first time Gus was able to see his former bullies in his own actions. He did not like it and he makes steps in later episodes to be more friendly to King and treat him like one of the group.

Now Let’s go to Mattholomule. Gus was a jerk to the other members of his club, but when Mattholomule does his whole “scared and lonely new kid who just wants friends act (which I know was not completely an act)” Gus believes it and really does seem genuine in wanting to be Mattholomule’s friend afterwards. When Mattholomule turn on them and sends Luz to the detention pit, Gus goes to save her, and Mattholomule gets literally dragged along in the crossfire. Gus could have left Mattholomule to rot down there. There is a few options as to maybe why. Maybe Gus feels responsible since he kinda started this whole mess. Maybe since Mattholomule has the most experience with dentition pits Gus and Luz thought they could need him in the escape. What ever reason Gus shows genuine kindness in recusing Mattholomule as well as Luz. That is not an act that Gus gets repaid back to him right away. As soon as they get out and Bump see’s what they did to the pit, he tries to blame Luz. Gus takes all the blame, part of which should got to Matty, but Matty only speaks up when he see’s that he still has the opportunity to steal Gus’s club. Just to be clear on Mattholomule as H.A.S.P: He is a jerk, he will be just as tyrannical as Gus was, and like Gus the club made him no friends, no more popular, and any power he thinks the title gives him is in his head. Gus has to leave and become better.

But in “Through the Looking Glass Ruins” we get more back story on Mattholomule. We meet his old crew (whom his brother does not seem to like him hanging out with anymore) and see that they are all better than him at magic and hear how his lack of polished skill led to other kids making Glandis very difficult for him. Mattholomule essentially dealt with the same issues as Gus but on the opposite end. Mattholomule tries his best to keep Gus away from the other kids, and Gus thinks this is just him being mean. Only to find out to late that these other kids are just using them both. Because Gus was once kind to Matholomule, something that try as he might Matty has apparently not been able to stop thinking about or being grateful for, Matty goes back to help him. After watching Gus defend the graveyard from his old crew Matty finally makes the right choice for the right reason (reasons other than power or dept) and offers to help fix it up. Then, at hearing the illusion history may have to be hidden away, Matty suggests that he and Gus can build it a stronger defense system. Gus has a new friend now (who may one day also become more than a friend, they do share interests and passions) and has renewed faith in both that illusion magic matters, and that people aren’t all bad, and are capable of changing for the better.

These lessons all come to play during Gus’s relationship with Hunter. Gus does not really like Hunter when they first meet. Hunter or “Caleb Jasper BloodWilliams” is a strange, rude mouthed, big kid, who Gus has not seen before, but getting Willow’s flyer derby team approved suddenly depends on him... It turns out “Caleb” is really Hunter, a.k.a the Golden Guard, and he is here to trick them into the roughest coven of them all. Yes Hunter regrets it and goes back to save them (actually he may have done it more for their palisman than them, but he still helped them). He did the right thing, only after lying to them, scamming them, and putting all of them in danger. Gus is not obligated to forgive Hunter or try and be his friend the next time meet. When they meet again Gus half expects Hunter to try and pull the same crap, until he learns that Hunter is on the run. Then he offers him help and a listening ear. Gus did this because he knows that Hunter is not 100% bad, feels empathy for how alone/confused/scared Hunter is, and he knows people can change for the better. Gus has come along way from the bratty, vindictive, kid he sometimes acted like in season 1a. To him these basic acts of kindness do not seem like much, but to Hunter, who is going through so much, they mean the world. It’s because of Gus’s influence that Hunter finds the courage to come out of hiding and publicly supports the rebel side. This indirectly helps lead to all 6 kids (I included King) being together on the day of Unity and able to help each other against Belos.

Gus Porter All and All

Gus is a really great, well thought out character. He is in the background more than some others, and I wish the show had brought him to the forefront more (I do believe that if the show had run longer we would have gotten more of him and Matty protecting the graveyard, Matty introducing him to his favorite book series, and Gus meeting Steve. Grrr). But even when Gus is stuck in the background he still has some really interesting arc’s going on and you miss out if you just dismiss him. I also appropriate Gus getting to do important things and be a hero from the background, he reminds me of Codename: Kids next Door’s numbah 5 in that respect. She mostly stayed out of the spotlight by choice, but was indisputably the backbone of her team. Gus’s journey through school and the insecurities that he deals with remind me a lot of myself when I was younger as well as friends I had back then. I am willing to bet a lot of kids in school can relate to Gus and I like how so much of his feelings and situation are shown to us instead of told. Its nice that kids can see him, and have him to help learn to not doubt or be so hard on them selves, You are special, the right people will see you as such. IF the voices in your head call you names, then tell them to shut up because they do not know.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

What about an scenario about Kai thinking on proposing and struggling with how to do it, cuz he wants it be perfect

Of course!

"No. Horrific." He shook his head at his mind daring to think on such a terrible idea as he threw the paper on the nearby trash can on his office.

If he knew that preparing to proposing to someone was that hard, he would've had started to think about the issue right when he started to date you, because hole hell. It was harder then he thought.

And he was struggling with this shit for at least three weeks.

For something, or better yet, someone to get his attention and respect was extremely rare. And only one case in his all twenty something years of life was the special kind, the one who he had allowed to open up about his past and didn't judged him, the one who could atture and even came to love him for exactly what he was, despite having all his radical thoughts and issues like his mysophobia and... mental problems if you could even call it like that?

An angel that came from above to give his life some light and what he never thought he would have wanted neither need it at some point. Love and care.

You, a quirkless person who he always insisted that you were pure. An example for this sick society to follow, not to exclude like you were the wrong here.

He despised those type of people. How could they not see it that you were the original and right type of human? The one that wasn't sick like the others?

Ignoring all of that. After some years of knowing eachother, passing through good and bad, he had came to an thought some months ago that it wasn't leaving his head, no matter how hard he tried... until one day he simply gave up, and accepted it.

"I want (Y/n) to be mine. For life."

He remember those words he said to himself clear as the bright day outside. The realization took some time, but it hitted him like a train would. He truly loved you, only having you as a partner wasn't "enough", no. He felt the urge to have something, to prove to you and the world that you were his...

And for the first time in his life, he would say without a problem that he belonged to someone as well, even having his possessive habbits.

You were just like the moon and the clear night sky filled with stars for him. Despite the darkest and the most cold that the night can bring, they were always there to lead the human kind to safety directions.

... see? He thought on all of that. But he couldn't say it out loud. And that shit sounded way too cliche to propose to someone.

"Night sky? Fucking pathetic." He burried his face in his hands to growl freely on them before sighing and laying back on his chair.

Worst. The worst were the hardest, yes. But how the fuck should he do it in the first place? Just kneel on some dirty ground and say shit? On where? When?

He felt like he was going insane. He was always so serious and intelligent, always quick to make decisions. But this time? He felt for once pathetic.

He cant even think on where or how to propose to his loved one, what the actual hell?

"Sorry for the news boss. But those papers are from the other... you good?" He heard Kurono and Irinaka's voices and he grunted before standing up.

"Those are from rivals or allies?" He asked nonchantly as he grabbed the papers and read them cautiously with eyes full of disinterest and boredom.

"Allies." Kurono answered back before looking at the trash can filled with what was once papers "You were working on something?"

"None of your interest." He sighed and gave the papers back to Mimic "Return them to their owners, this doesn't have my interest and I have no time to waste on filth garbage like those."

Mimic nodded and left... but Kurono remained on the room. Catching a glimpse of what the messy papers were written and catching immediately what was going on.

And he felt nostalgia. Back to those days where he teased Kai freely. He could die that he wouldn't care, this was gold.

Chisaki looked at him with a arched eyebrow as he took of his mask and showed a smirk to him, the young head of the Shie Hassaikai already not liking one bit that face that smug bastard was doing it.

"Never took you to be the type of wanting to get married."

"... you son of a-"

"Relax! Relax!" Kurono dodged one attack of Kai and sighed in relief at not being killed by that spike Chisaki had just created. Bit still was chuckling "Is just surprinsing to see a guy who always claimed taht love didn't existed and DESPISE even the concept of touch wanting to get married."

"This has nothing of your interest, get out of my sign before I-"

"And you seem troublesome with that, judging by the amount of discarded papers, which by the way are not-" in one second he was overhauled and came back to look at a very infuriated Kai right in front of him.

"One more word that I will kill you for real and dont return back." He growled as Kurono smirked.

"Right, I will stop." Chisaki scoffed and went back to sitting on his desk with a huff but only burried his head on his gloved hands again as he stared at the blank paper in front of him.

"... If this is about (Y/n) accepting or not, they are crazy for you Kai. The least they could say is to wait a bit, but surely will accept." He tried to say something as Kai only sighed and pointed at no where while pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I have no idea why I am talking with out of all people this, but this is one of many of my issues about this."

"So there is more?"

"Much. First is that I have no fucking idea how to do it."

It was silence for a bit until Chisaki noticed how Kurono's eyes were wide open in shock, he arched an eyebrow as a silent question for him to explain his reaction.

"You? The most rational and strategist around here? Doesn't have a plan to propose?" He send a dark glare at Kurono as the man winced and rubbed the back of his head "Man, than the situation is critical."

"I apreciate the words Chronostasis. Really." He said in venom sarcasm before sighing again.

"You really dont have any ideas? Like, at all?" He shook his head and Kurono brought his hand to his chin in thought before snapping his fingers "Thought about asking advice to Pops?"

"You're kidding?" He glared at Kurono "The old man won't never leave down this one, and probably will be sappy shit."

"... doesn't you and (Y/n) do 'sappy shit' all the time?" He lifted his hand sup in surrender at Kai's death glare "No offense, but ever heard of 'the thought that it counts'? (Y/n) is not a person that is difficult to impress and enjoy the simple things. You know that better than anyone else in here dude."

"Of course I do, who do you take me for?" He asked in anger before sighing and looking down with a frown at the blank paper "... but they are not simple. (Y/n) made a drastic change in my life... so no one can't blame me for wanting and craving a unforgettable and memorable moment. I... I simply want to give (Y/n)-" Kurono widen his eyes at the way his cold childhood friend softened his usual murderous golden eyes at the mention of your name "The best. The best proposal, the best life, the best memories... I want this to be flawless, something that they can't look back and say 'it could have been-'. I want that neither os us have any regrets on this decision. Like the nowadays, where I dont have any regrets o entering on a relationship for the first time."

He lifted his head and found Hari looking at him with a smirk and he immediately scowled at it.

"Then I guess asking for some advice from the old man, despite hearing the no endless teasing would be worth it?" He tilted his head as Chisaki seemed in deep in thought "You got the help and service of all the yakusa, so you just need a plan. If you may allow, we will offer assistance and follow your orders."

He hated to admit that the blockhead was right. Absolutely despised it.

"... I guess."

Soon the door opened and the said so old man arched an eyebrow at the boys he raised in the same room and looking so serious but yet... like it wasn't a meeting neither business issue?

"Mind the both telling me what is going on?"

"Chisaki is thinking on proposing to (Y/n)." Kurono said nonchantly and dodged another attack of Kai.

"You disgusting piece of fucking-!"

"You are?" The elder asked in a certain serious tone, looking straight at Chisaki soul, catching him completely out of guard by his look.

"Is it a issue?" He remained his composture and uncaring look, but his nerves were starting to grow a bit at the thought that his mentor didn't approve it.

The man looked up and down at Chisaki before speaking in the same serious tone.

"Marriage is not only about claiming someone as yours Chisaki. Is about to care and vow even yourself for your partner. Protection, trust, respect are always the main pillars of having on a relationship and marriage." He turned hsi whole body to be in front of Chisaki as he spoke eyes to eye with him "Cases of the person who had their firts relationship and marriages are rare, but not impossible. Those are the ones we have to be extremely careful with. Now... knowing you in the way I do, answer me with pure bold honesty like you always did-"

The room went silent and even Kurono seemed uncomfortable at Pops seriousness, really considering on tip toeing out of the room.

"Do you really want this? What exactly brought you to this decision?"

Chisaki stared nonchantly at his mentor before sighing.

"What brought me for this decision was how and only (Y/n) makes me feel. The only thoughts I have before them were merely focused on rage towards my disgusting past, my hatred towards the heroes and how should I pay you for such kindness for taking me in.... with (Y/n) although I did not felt like a empty shell, I felt... I feel alive."

The elder hummed and asked one more last question.

"And you love (Y/n)? Enough to spend the rest of your life with them?"

"... I would crawl to hell and get back to earth if it meant I can see that smile and joy on my angel's face."

The elder chuckled lowly before patting Chisaki's shoulder, surprising the said man.

"Then you have my back Chisaki. And my blessing." He patted his head harshly out of sudden, causing Chisaki to growl and scoot away "And I heard you are struggling, I will give you some advice."

"I didn't ask for any of-"

"Bullshit." Chisaki deadpanned at the old man's vulgar vocabulary "If you're going to propose them you're doing it right."

He was in hell... why couldn't he had avoided all of this by merely thinking of something? Curse him and his brain.

"Am I interrupting something?" That voice right now was the last one he needed to hear.

"Angel, is actually-"

"(Y/N) my dear. Mind accompanying Kurono to grab some groceries?" Pops said suddenly and uncaringly "We are out of those. And I need to have a word with Chisaki."

"We are? Oh." Kurono muttered before going to the door frame "Yeah we are."

"But-"

"I will own you one my dear, dont be late."

"Pops I swear to god-" Chisaaki started to growl but the sound of Chrono closing the door caused his eye to twitch in irritation.

"So. Any ideas that crossed your mind?" The order spoke and chisaki only deadpanned at him "Cleary not apparently."

Someone, any divine creature... free him from his hell hole. Please.

[mi4014andrewjung]

Research on Philosophy through School of Thought

Philosophy videos Research Notes: School of Thought

Plato: Allegory of the Cave

Parallels to the Life of Socrates

A section from “The Republic” by Socrates can denote that Plato’s famous Allegory of the cave is a homage to Socrate when he was executed for stimulating philosophy.

This homage can be seen because in the Allegory, Socrates can be seen as the figure who escaped from the cave and after seeing the sun and colors (Light of Reason) and he is plotted to be killed after bringing back this knowledge to those still inside the cave. Who have knowledge only of phantoms which appear through the caves.

Opposition to Democracy: Plato believed the voting process should be done with a estimated and calculated judgement, thus believing an established public who are trained in philosophy. Therefore, a leader and the followers must be philosophers and leaders in thinking.

The Forms: What is the ideal? To get the ideal even stonemasons would possess an example(blueprint).

Philosophy of finding the blueprint: grasping this model leads to reducing buffers. Discovering forms is also a search. The ideal(form) quality is relative.

Socrates

Opposition to Democracy, Ship theory

Vessel controlled by experienced or random? Who should be fit to control.

Therefore, it is irresponsible for a public to vote without a formal education or experience with thinking rationally about issues. Socrates argues those who vote must be qualified.

Demagogues: eroded , exploit our desire for easy answers

Sweet shop vs Doctor debate

Pain for good

Saliant warning by socrates:

We preferred to think of democracy as an unambiguous good rather than as something that is only ever as effective as the education system that surrounds it.

Aristotle

Four Main Questions

What makes people happy

11 Virtues of successful people

Golden mean

     2) What is Art for?

- Tragedy: reminds us that terrible things can befall decent people, should have more compassion for those whose actions go disastrously wrong

- To make profound truths about life stick in our minds

- Use of peripeteia, anagnorisis: Catharsis (cleaning up our feelings of fear and pity)

3) What Are friends for?

4) How can Ideas cut through a busy world?

Soothing, and funny, see the emotional side

Epicurus: What makes people happy?

Stoics:

Life is full of tragedy- it is about feeling okay and everything’s gonna be fine

Not to be confused about consoling to hope.

Wise person should aim to reach a state where simply nothing could suddenly disturb their peace of mind. Every tragedy should be priced in.

Examples include nero’s tutor- Seneca

Seneca stated before ordered to commit suicide in front of nero and his family in spite of his wife and daughter soaking in tears, “ what need is there to weep over parts of life the whole of it calls for tears”

The consolation of philosophy - Boethius

Divine comedy- dante: centrepiece

Appalling circumstances.

Blessed life (married beautiful wife with two children)

but , suddenly his fortune ran out

Accused of Plotting against vengeful king Is in despair

Think of his way philosophically out of his sorrows

Opening

Describes listless sadness and terror at his state

“ white hairs are scattered untimely on my head, and the skin hangs loosely from my worn out limbs”

In this downcast state, gets an unexpected visit from “lady Philosophy” carrying classical books and a scpetre on the other hand (to remind him the fundamental truths of his favourite subject- defined by the stoics)

Classical world, philosophy was not an abstract discipline, it was a set of tools specifically designed to help one live and die well, and with particular relevance at the darkest moments.

She reminds him- As the Stoics say, Human beings are not in control of most of what happens to them. Our destiny is in large measure in the hands of a devilishly powerful seductive goddess known as fortuna.

Capacity to rule people’s fates (path of success or with a blith smile stir into a path of catastrophe)

To be philosophers is to resist her blandishments, to know never to put complete faith in the things that are, ultimately, always in the hands of an immoral and reckless force- and to prepare for the day when we may have to surrender her gifts at a stroke.

Gifts comprise of fundamental ingredients to happiness: love, family, children, prosperity, reputation and career.

For a stoic philosopher, none of these things should ever really trusted. For all of them can be lost in horrific circumstances at any moment.

Fortune, has many disguises and the extent to which she seduces with friendship the very people she is striving to cheat, until she overwhelms them with unbearable grief at the suddeness of her desertion.

Wise must resist to the fortune

Fortune wheel: spins between success and favour, appalling punishment and pain.

If you try stopping the wheel from turning, you of all men are the most obtuse. You are seeking to regain what really did not belong to you.

“ Happiness cannot consist in things governed by chance”  

Happiness- led by fortune.

Wheel of fortune - promise to disgrace

Peace of mind: the ingredients we associate with happiness as in truth direct conduits to a fundamental instability, and thereby to inner torment and anxiety.

Boethius wisdom was to be

Apreciating how little of our lives is in our hands. The ubiquity and fickleness of fortune and our need to look beyond public opinion, family love and status

Identify with cast forces of nature.

Augustus : Criticism of Rome

Earthly Happiness

Optimistic lot, the builders of the pont du gard, and the Colosseum had faith in technology and in the power of humans to master themselves and their ability to control nature and plot for their own happiness.

Keen practitioners of self-help: the human animal was something eminently open to being perfected

2) A Just social order

Romans trusted that their society was marked by justice.

Capacity to make money was held to reflect both practical ability and also degree of inner virtue

Fame - respectable ideal

CITY OF GOD

All human were crooked because all of us are unwitting heirs to the sins of Adam.

Sinful nature- libido dominandi( cannot probably love (egoism)) fail to understand ourselves. Chiding all philosophers who try to find bliss on earth

Statement is blessing?: lives are awry not by coincidence but by definition simply because were human ( intuit virtue and love) not for ourselves. Odds stacked against us from the start.

Two cities: city of god vs city of men

Latter: men can not create pervasively flawed society money can track virtue.

[saladname]

To make art contrary to popular beliefs there are actually rules. Some qualities are needed to make an artwork: intelligence to be able to make the piece speak for itself, true art doesn’t need curatorial texts nor rhetoric nor a sanctuary to be art or to be explained, if you take the artwork out of the museum you can still see that it is an artwork, it doesn’t need the gallery or the museum to be a piece of art, real art can speak for itself. Sensitivity to be able to look at the world and make something out of that through the artist experiences. Originality to create that state of awe, to present to the viewer a new vision that makes the artistic experience real and powerful. Work to put that piece of the artist into the artwork. Mastery to be able to create the message, how could anyone express themselves correctly if they can not master their lengaguage? Art is a lenguaje, just like music, is universal, and you need to know what you are doing. Art is not subjective, actually is pretty obvious, you can tell true art from something that is not with bare eyes. You don’t need a masters degree in arts to apreciete art, you don’t need to study to apreciete beauty or to have this amazing experience of catharsis. That’s what snobs want to make people believe, that you need to have a higher IQ or a masters in history of art to apreciete art, or that you need to be an elite human being to be involved in this world. Art is for everyone and usually if what you are seeing doesn’t look like art is because it isn’t. Picasso for instance had a lot of practice, he made quite a lot of artworks going from nothing, to realism, to his own very unique style. Phalic sculptures of Pompeii can be art but you have to rembeber that time in history, their context, their lifestyle and their mentality. There is a word in Spanish for that kind of art and it is “Artesanía” something like crafts but not so banal. Why is it so easy to know when music is art or while watching a dancer or with acting but visual arts are so subjective? You know when a melody is art because it makes you feel goosebumps, you can hear it, you can feel it. Same with dancing, you know when a dancer is excellent because with their just human movements they are making you feel something unique, that’s the artistic experience, you can even shiver and cry. Acting is so transparent you can tell in that exact moment when someone is not good or is faking it. That works for visual arts too, this ocurrences are not art, this trash is occupying the space a real artist can actually take. How many amazing artist are constantly struggling because they are not aprecieated and can’t get into a gallery or a museum? People who are working so hard to improve and create something better every time. It’s so sad as an artist to pour all yourself into a piece of art and being underapreciated while this is in a gallery probably sold for thousands and thousands of dollars. This modern society is just plain stupid, so stupid even art is becoming stupid.

#1yrago "I Agree": Visualizing terms of service with long scrolls of colored paper

“I Agree” is a Dima Yarovinsky’s art installation for Visualizing Knowledge 2018, with printouts of the terms of service for common apps on scrolls of colored paper, creating a bar chart of the fine print that neither you, nor anyone else in the history of the world, has ever read.

Thanks to Nightpool for identifying the work and its creator!

https://boingboing.net/2018/05/07/tldr.html

[amylostsomewhere]

    A nervous feet, a hand movement on a conversation I can’t hear, a nod, “how long has she been laughing for?”

I have a loud, messy mind. I guess it’s always been this way; I can’t tell with exactitude, I ‘ve been too busy having 50 thoughts at the same time.

“Oh no! I forgot I had a deadline!

But Sex and the City was so fun… 

Wait is she wearing the same jacket as I am?”

Processed with VSCO with a4 preset

Processed with VSCO with a4 preset

  It has taken me a really long time to realize how much of a problem having a loud mind can be. Don’t worry I won’t complain about it, over the years I’ve come to apreciate it, but there are some little things I’ve come up with to help me get throught the day as a responsible, productive human.

If there’s something I’ve always been entirely grateful for is when I find something that can keep my mind quiet for more than 5 minutes. Writting, reading a good book, painting my nails or my newest hobby: people staring.

The busy society we live in has forgotten, almost completely, what it feels to take a moment to just breath in and appreciate the details life gifts us everyday. To look around and realize how the delivery guy that always brings me my purchases goes by at the same time everyday right in front of the cafeteria I like to have coffee in the morning.

There’s an episode of Grey’s Anatomy where Bailey can tell exactly what her son needs by the way he cries, and although I can ensure how accurate that can be in real life it does teach us how attention to details can make life easier, funnier.

      people staring, my new hobby A nervous feet, a hand movement on a conversation I can't hear, a nod, "how long has she been laughing for?"

[dass-ist-egal]

it’s been 2 years of existencial crysis

I want to talk to you and know what you think about me.

I couldn’t complete it and it makes me feel sad.

I’m ashamed of that.

I can’t feel happy for others anymore.

I’m doing my best but it’s really tiring.

I want to do so many things but I feel that chainging my rutine will make me miserable.

I’m already miserable.

will I ever go there again?

even if I did, I wouldn’t have anyone to talk to.

I’m too ashamed to try to talk to the people I met when I was there.

I hate my country.

I hate my language.

I hate my family.

I don’t like my friends anymore even though they really care about me, I don’t hate them but I’ve become so picky that even the slightest thing bothers me.

I listen to emo music and think about killing myself all the time but I’m not brave enough to do it and I don’t really want to anyway.

I need someone to save me but nobody really has to.

when I think about that time I feel happy, sad and ashamed also because I couldn’t really “connect” as I wanted to.

I envy people with good strong close relationships, I don’t wish them any bad, I just would like to have the same.

all of my relationships are really close but in a different way, pretty much everybody I know knows that I’m depressed and I hate my life.

I’ve thought about working for two years and invest in real estate but I’m scared of it taking too long.

probably none of my dreams have come true.

I’ve thought a lot about opening a youtube channel and just talking about the things I like even if nobody watches it, like this blog it’d be to pass the time but I can’t finish any script, I want to do something that I’d enjoy myself and I’d love to speak in english but sometimes my accent becomes stronger and I feel bad about it, I know that many people like them or just don’t care but I do and as many people would say “that’s what matters”

im probably just a disgusting human being.

I feel disgusted by my father.

I feel disgusted by the way people talk in this place.

I feel disgusted by the way they think they are doing something worthy when in reality what they’re doing could hardly be called that.

I hate critics, I don’t want to accept them, I want to be told stuff nicely and I know that that’s probably immature but I simply can’t stand them (though I happily accept suggestions)

I think I’m a snob but I don’t want to be that.

my mindset can change really quick so right now I may say that I’m bloody disgusted by critics but I may want some in the future and I guess that it makes me a little inconsistent though if you were in my head you’d know that it’s not really THAT inconsistent.

many people in real life think of me as rich or wealthy and to this country I am?

I don’t know, I think that I’m just not as stupid as them and spend my money properly, pretty much any one of them should be wealthier than me but they’re all too stupid to realize that.

none of this really matters, in 200 years I’ll most likely be dead and this will be lost on the internet.

sometimes I like to think about bad moments or stuff that made me misserable to fill the void with misery, I think that being happy here would be betraying myself.

even if it makes me miserable a long time ago I decided that I’d never betray myself and that I’d never be a hypocrite, if something is wrong then it’s wrong and even if it’s easier or more convinient I’ll just avoid it and do it the way I think of as the right one.

I like fancy talking but I probably suck at it, I wish I could meet someone that I could talk to like that and do references and stuff.

sometimes I feel that I connect with some anime characters just because they were in a similar situation to mine, I’ve felt my mindset is really similar to izaya orihara’s but I wouldn’t poison anyone or trick them in such ways it’s just that the way he speaks is really similar to the way I speak in real life and the way he thinks is also really similar to mine somehow.

I’ve also felt related to chitose from girlish number since we’re also really similar in some ways, we both want to achive greatness without making a real effort or getting our hands dirty.

I wonder a lot and most of the times I get an idea and then shut myself up, for example I was thinking about what would happen if someone tried to guide me in real life but then I remembered that everybody is fucked and if that person could do it then it means that I’m most likely able to do it to hence that person can’t be so far way from me.

I don’t love myself but I don’t really hate me, I usually don’t think about myself it’s something like “i’d like this to happen or I hate that person or I don’t do that” but... well I probably think of myself as just a person?

I’m incomplete and I know that if everybody was like me society would be fucked (wich sounded funny on my mind) but I don’t think that I’m a bad person.

I wish I was more handsome or something.

I’m too awkward and I’d also love to be able to walk to a new place without trembling, sometimes I can but for some reason it mostly happens when I’m alone, if I’m with someoine else that person goes in front of me and asks for the stuff for me and if there is a questiont hen I may tell them what to do or just directly answer to that person.

the air of this city is so poluted I don’t want to breath but if I don’t I’ll die and it hurts so I have to do it but still, that’s something that goes through my mind all of the time.

I do my best to never flaunt about anything but maybe I’m too quick to talk, once a friend of a friend saw something of mine and told me wow you have that thing, to which I replied it’s not as great as you may think.

my life without it would be WAY worse but still I think that there is room for improvement.

I believe that if something is not of your liking you should complain or try to change it yourself as long as it makes sense and it’s not bothering anyone.

it seems like my grandfather doesn’t believe in that but I think that if nobody complained technology and pretty much everything would take even longer to improve.

the best part of my day is probably when I see that someone uploaded a video or an anime just came out, if I start one I do my best to finish them even though sometimes they’re terrible.

last season I didn’t watch the last episode of 3-4 animes just because I wasn’t feeling like it and I thought that those animes are not really alright.

I wouldn’t really want to move to japan, I think that I’d probably say yes if the opportunity comes by but I know that life there is “terrible” for different reasons.

I feel sick of people saying that they know what other people are thinking like for example this country thinks about this or that topic or I know you’ll love thisI know that I talk a lot about how people from my country and also this part of the continent act but I’ve met them myself and I can tell, they’ve just talked a little bit to some, for example there’s an image that says something like “the japanese say that if nobody has done it before I have to be the first to do it”. it may sound inspiring but to me it sounds really stupid, if I haven’t talked to anyone (something that happens some days) this phrase becomes the stupidiest thing I’ve read on that day. I understand that just because nobody has done it it doesn’t have to mean that such thing is impossible but seriously they have to stop exaggerating, if you’re not interested you’re not fucking interested, I won’t do something that nobody else has done before NOT BECAUSE I CAN’T BUT BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO.

I once saw something like “the minimum wage there is -----” and well. it also bothered me, it’s higher yes but it’s not 40 times our wage.

I just said our but I don’t like to think of myself as someone from this country, I know that most of my ancestors immigrated from other parts of the world and I wouldn’t say that I necessarily hold pride to it (I have no real pride) but it helps me to distantiate myself from the others. I don’t talk like them and I’ve been told many times that I don’t look like them. in fact sometimes I’m asked where am I from but I wouldn’t really say that there is a clear answer for that, I’ve been told that I look like I’m from western europe or from another country in the continent I live in which would mean that yea I look different but not THAT different, a friend of mine told me that I look like I’m from a neighboring country (which is on bad terms with this one and many people could think of that as an insult BUT IDGAF) but their ethnicy is different so that’s also a thing. I don’t want to be looked as racist, I don’t want to be racist or anything, I want everyone to be happy and to be able to feel free and be... well... the word might be apreciated or just not discriminated, I can tell that I don’t do that I just don’t like being told that I’m like most people since I don’t like them. I wouldn’t turn my back on someone just because he or she has a different skin color, I’m not even that white though it’s still white enough for people here to think of me as such.

(in fact I’ve been told by some white people that I’m not white or that I’m “a mix?” idk how tho say it in this language since it’s not my mothertounge though it’s the thing I hold the most pride to though I’de love to keep on improving)

once I was in a concert with 2 friends and somebody asked me where I was from and one of my friends told him that I didn’t go out that much LOL it probably was the funniest and meanest thing I had heard in this year though it didn’t bother me.

sometimes I wish I could just have first world problems, most of them are somewhat stupid though (of course that is my opinion)

I believe in gender equality which is something that not many people do in this country, not only that but women themselves don’t believe in that and I’d say that even though that limits them it also gives them some sort of “power” because “if you argue with one you’re a bad person and if you hit one you’re the most evil guy in the universe” so if one of them hit you or insult you you take it and do nothing about it (which I was never willing to do)

it’s not like I wanted to insult everyone and hit them, “bothering” someone for no reason is the opposite of what I want to do but I’d love to be able to defend myself though I’d like to not need that either.

I just read the tittle again so I guess that I’m gonna keep explaining myself.

I’m too afraid to say your name and when I think too much about it I sort of want to cry, I could say that I feel in love with you but not in a sexual way, you probably became my best friend (which is pathetic since we didn’t see each other for more than 4 months) I thought that you understood me and I know that I wasn’t a “perfect human being” in fact I think that I’m doing something about it by explaining myself here, when i post something here I usually give some context on the hashtag section, I guess I could wish that I was more like you and less like me.

I could say that I admire you if I had to say that I admire someone but you’re just a normal person who happened to be really nice to me and that I felt connected to.

I wonder if you think about me. once a day? once a month? once a year?

I do think about you all the time, about what would you do if I ever saw you again.

I oppened myself too soon to you and I’m scared of what you might do with that information, if you were to find this blog I’d feel really ashamed and scared of what you may say, I don’t want to erase it.

....... I don’t want to see you here. leave and never come back.... I’d be afraid of that.

how have you been? would you like to talk or something?.... that’d be great.

I won’t contact you because I know that you don’t want to talk to me anymore, you made it very clear but I’m.

I began to think about something else and lost what I was thinking about.

I don’t want to look like my father, I can’t stare at him without feeling disgusted.

not everyone does that, he can go around without problems, it’s not that he is utterly ugly or something but I don’t like the way he looks or dresses and I don’t want to be like that at all.

I want to grow taller and I know that I still can, I think that 10cm is probably too much but I would like to grow that much, i’m already “tall” or ok for this country’s standars but that’s not my goal.

I don’t like staring or looking at people in the street, I usually look somewhere else, a friend of mine once told me that he thought that I had probably thought that he was a robber (he said that as a joke, that’s the kind of person he is) but what really happened was that I hadn’t recognized him from far away so I didn’t want to look at him, I was looking at the floor to not have contact with some random person on the street, I guess that I’m afraid of someone yelling or insulting me and trying to rob me in the streets but that’s what I’ve been thought and it’s something difficult to change since most of what’s is in the news is “this person was robbed and killed” or something like that.

the tittle was probably great for when I started but now it’s simply not enough, I’d change it to something like talking abouy my personal issues or sumarising my problems but it probably wouldn’t fit all of the text.

I’d say that I’d love to keep expanding this post but right now at this exact point in time I;m out of ideas and expanding it is not something that i’d necessarily love but rather “enjoy”? it made me feel many things and even if nobody really reads this, it makes me comfortable and scared.